76. 1 girl, 2 cups
& a husband, a baby and a pup. The year is about to end, these are the things I'm grateful for.
“You’ll go from girl to woman when you get your period,” they said. That didn't happen to me so I waited patiently. “I’m sure they meant when I have sex for the first time.” Nope. “Maybe when I start paying rent,” I thought, equivocally. “Okay, so when I get married.” Nothing. “Oh, I see, the mutation will occur when I have a baby.” Yes, you guessed it. I had a baby. Still not a woman. And I think I’m starting to understand what Britney meant. -Or the people who wrote that song for her.-
It is true that a readjustment transpires when you have a baby. In my case, I became a mother, not a woman. So, I will keep waiting for the “big change.” However, I’m starting to question if I ever was a girl, in the first place.
It’s not like I’m just waiting for the woman to finally materialize. I’m not sitting in silence, staring at a blank wall, waiting really hard. Years ago, I learned waiting hard doesn’t help the time pass any faster. So there’s a practical tip for you!
Next year I’m turning 30. Thirty years on Earth. Pretty cool. Will it be then when I turn into a woman? I don’t know. But I’ll keep you posted.
In the meantime, I’m trying to train my brain to be grateful. I’m also trying to resist the urge to set goals for 2023.
I’m grateful for many things. I’m grateful because we’re healthy and safe. But I’m also grateful for some sentences that randomly pop up in my head, with no context. Like this one I wrote yesterday: All I really want. What I really, really desire is to be held by a pure raccoon.